I have absolutely no reason to be fed up. The sun is shining, I have a nice life, good health, well mannered (mostly!) children and a partner who works very hard to provide for us and who loves me almost as much as I love him! Which just makes me more fed up at being fed up!!
I'm having a bad week...my 3 year old is being rather challenging (!!) and I am not coping. Put that with a half finished house that would be difficult enough to keep clean if I could find the time to attempt it, a teenager who thinks he's an only child, a 10 yr old with school 'issues' at the moment and a breastfed baby who need just as much attention as the 3 year old, and a partner who goes away monday to work and comes home saturday morning most weeks.....and I feel completely out of my depth.
I'm not writing about this for sympathy !!! I decided to have 4 children, all were planned - and most weeks I thrive on the chaos... I reassure myself that most of you out there have felt like this at times........
I think the problem is I have spent the week losing my patience with, or shouting at a little boy who, yes is acting totally spoilt at the moment, but is well, just being 3, and I feel inadequate for not coping. As being a mum is my only role in life at the moment (as well as chief cook and bottlewasher!!) , it feels poo to be failing at it!
I wish my 'they are only little for a short time' mantra would work for me this week!
I need more me time (a rationed luxury these days!), so in order to free up some evenings next week, I have paid someone to do my holiday ironing! Even this makes me feel inadequate, if I worked I could justify it!!
So hopefully next time I post I may be a bit more positive.
Apologies for a moany pictureless post, I'm off to bed in clean sheets.....that may raise a small smile!!!
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